Griff to Grandpa after Whitney scowled at grandpa for several seconds.
"Your like the daughter I never had"
Griff on the amount of hats and shoes Keelan owns and continues to buy.
"Do you enjoy rolling in the cheese keeger?"
As Griff puts his 20s and 100s back into his wallet he looks Keelan right in the eyes.
"If you out-drive me this weekend, I will punch myself in the face. If you BEAT me I will eat a golf ball, I will put it in my mouth and eat it"
Griff to Keelan about their golf game later that day.
"Id rather drink ass water then go back to our house. Im on the Island of maui right now, I dont want to go back to my ass water house."
Griff while leaving the Hawaiian islands.
"While you two were swimming in a beautiful lagoon touching each others feet, I was siting under a burnt out lightbulp and smelly dog ass."
Griff commenting on the difference between Christine and Keelan's nice weekend together and his poor one at home alone.
"Lost Visuals! Lost Visuals, Chris!!! Lost Visuals"
As a man sits down in front of him and no longer can see his phone charging across the hallway of the airport Griff says
"Why is everyone angry at me? Because you pulled my pants down and took a picture of it! Ohh..kay, Keelan why are you mad at me?"
At the dinner table Griff inquires about the feelings of the rest of the family
"Tell them on me"
Aidan, while daring Keelan to give him up to Mom and Dad after he spilled water on the carpet.
"He only has a back pack... Wheres his thud stick? Wheres his thunders haft!?"
After seeing Musician Mike Watt in the Oakland Airport, Griff commented on the absence of a seemingly crucial piece of luggage missing.
"Check and send!"
A term that means to be over and done with something. It may be used as an exclamation point to a sentence.
ex. I am going to the store with or without you...Check and Send! or Well I happen to like these pants and you know what Im keeping them on...Check and Send!
"What!? My hands aren't in my pants...right now"
Grandpa (Pat) get mad at Aidan for having his hands in his pants and accuses Keelan of doing the same by saying: Aidan! Get your god damn hands out of your pants, you too keelan. Keelan responds to the accusation with humor
"Well...on the bright side, at least shes always dancing"
During her first public apperence since the attack, Gabby Giffords walks across a stage to recite the pledge of allegiance to millions of teary eyed viewers across the country, and Griff comments on her situation.
"I know you dont care-but for my sake could you please put some fucking clothes on?!"
Aidan walks into the living room wearing just underwear and Griff doesn't like it and responds with anger.
"Im going to find a tooth"
Griff asks Erin what she is doing walking around and combing the grass with her eyes down at the horse stables. Erin responds with a straight face.
"Boo! Wheres the Magic?"
While performing a magic show in front of the family, Keelan makes a mistake during a trick and the girls respond with hisses, boos, and unkind hurtful words.
-Whitney, Erin, and Carol
"You knoughblocked the dip"
After tasting a batch of the famous "chip a' dip" made by Grandma (Carol) and Aidan, Griff alluded to an infamous Yankee to explain his displeasure.